Windows of Happiness ~ A childs Imagination

The gorgeous Fi from over at My Mummy Daze has started a new linky called

The aim is to try and beat the wintery blues that seem to be swirling around the place.
To find the positive amongst the rain and cold.

I know I am suffering, some days quite badly other days just mommentarily but ither way I dont like feeling this way and I dont like that a season has something to do with it!

I use to love winter! Curled up on the couch with a blanket & hot chocolate were how I spent many a winters day... Then I had my boys.

Winter now consists of snotty noes, chesty coughs, huge electricity bills from the heater, daycare & kindy runs in the wind & rain and finding things to keep a 4yo and almost 2 yo entertained when the weather is miserable outside.

So really this linky is perfect timing for me and my boy blues as we are having some yucky weather and they are going stir crazy!

Take a peek into week 1 of my Window of Happiness...

Saturday morning was a hard one for me, I dont like mess and Cyclone J and Tornado C has ripped through with a vengance.

When things arise that I have no control over I can get very overwhelmed, I then look to the things I can control which unfortuantly for me is my house.
Cleaning, organising and tidying all help me feel calm and make dealing with the things I can't control so much easier to deal with.

It is not a good thing I am fully aware of that but I am getting so much better at letting the house go and not worrying that I'm stepping over books, standing on duplo, tripping over matchbox cars, have a sink full of dishes or a mountain of washing screaming my name.

Luckily for me I've made huge progress and something Saturday morning stopped me, just as I was about to let loose and lose my cool I breathed, walked away and stopped and listened to them playing.

I was in awe, they were using their imaginations!

In a world of technology, foxtel and fancy toys my boys were playing the old fashioned way, the way my brother and I use to play.

At first I saw mess...

But really they were playing happily creating differnt scenarios.

At first I saw a stripped bed...

But really it was a pillow tv and they were laying on Master Js Cars couch watching a movie.

At first I saw a table getting broken or a child getting hurt...

But it was really master J driving his brother around in a Monster Truck and all would be ok if I was watching and listening to make sure Master J didn't get too carried away.

At first I imagined them filling up my shopping bags full of all their toys and then them tipping them out all over the house... (as they;ve done before)

But really they were going shopping at "Woolies" (where their daddy works) to buy Ice coffee (because thats what their daddy likes)
Lil C kept walking around waving saying "byyyeeee"


So this morning with a slight attitude change what would have normally stressed me out made me smile, made me happy and surprsingly for me... made me calm.

Even better... it made a bleak wintery morning all that much brighter.

Have you had a Window of Happiness this week? Why not link up with Fi *here* and have a peak into other peoples windows too ;)

Making life that little bit smoother

Becoming a single mother ultimately meant I was doing the parenting for 2

Mentally is something I could handle but the physical side, meaning looking after them everyday

was going to be something I struggled with

With Master J having a developmental delay things were tough already, even with Mr S here

but at least I had an extra pair of hands

well most of the time but we will leave that blog post for my draft folder ;)

So how was I going to get through each day without completely losing the plot and ending up with a sparkly brand new white jacket and a padded cell to call my very own?

The answer for me was to be organised and prepared!

For some thats easier said then done

For me it comes quite naturally, I'm an organiser majoirty of the time

but trust me, just like most people I can get overwhelmed even when organsied!

So here a few things I do that help me get through each day that little bit more stress free
and of course they could be applied to all kinds of families!!

* Get pyjamas and nappys/jocks ready during the day
I try and do this one early in the morning and pop them into our
Pj Station
As both the boys bath together and get out together I find this helps in the fact im not searching for a matchin pjg top and bottom at the same time as I have 2 slippery towel wearing monsters running around ;)

"Raaahhhhh"

* Lay out clothes the night before

I always try and have the boys clothes, nappys/jocks, socks and shoes all ready to go for after breakfast

I check the weather the night before and then collect the clothes they need just before I tuck them into bed

* Pack daycare bags, nappy bags and handbags the night before

This is another sanity saver for me it saves rushing around in the morning trying to pack bags and not forget anything

Obviously don't pack bottles of milk or anything you want kept cold but there's no reason you cant have all that waiting in the fridge with a post it note stuck to the bags reminding you to pack it.

* Lay out breakfast dishes

This is another one that works well being done the night before

Just getting bowls, plates and spoons out ready can save some time and create less chaos, especially if you know you are going to be strapped for time.

* Meal Plan

I orginally started meal planning to save money and to avoid that 4pm~ish question

"what should we have for dinner tonight"

These days its also to help work arond the boys mainly their daycare days which are also the days I work and to try and build my freezer meals.

Through meal planning I know what we will be having during the week and on our busiest days I can prep the night before to make that night alot smoother.

Using my slow cooker is also a godsend! and there is always lots of leftovers to freeze.

* Start dinner preparation/cooking early
I find that about 3 o'clock is when it suits myself and the boys for me to begin getting dinner ready
It could simply mean cutting vegies ready or cooking a pie filling so it has time to cool.
It just means by 4/4:30ish I'm ready to start cooking for dinner to be served at 5pm
and by starting this early it allows time for distraction!
ie an upset toddler or toilet needing 3yo
which means I;ve still got plenty of time to get dinner sorted
and I dont end up stressed and frazzled at 5pm.

* Try and do at least 1 load of washing every day

This is another one that works quite well for me and the boys, for some reason I seem to have 1 decent sized load for 3 or 4 days straight and then I'm able to rest for 2 days or so while it builds up again

So doing one load a day helps lighten the work load and helps it dry quicker too!

As for the folding? well lets not go there ;)\

* Tidy & clean at night
Having kids running around all day and trying to clean is like trying to shovel snow in a blizzard
So even though I'll potter around the house during the day doing small bits and pieces I find if I do the bulk of my cleaning once the boys are in bed I can knock it over quite quickly.
The best thing i find it to not sit down especially if I'm feeling motivated.

..........................................................
As you can see alot of these are done of a night time or afternoon and for me it works.
I still get time to put my feet up at the end of the day too because without little hands trying to help it gets done quicker.
For you it might work better early in the morning ither way all of these are dependent on you, your family and your situation, because I am by no means a parenting/housewife expert.
All these ideas are as you would say
"tried and tested"
and work for me.
All you can do is try things and see if they work for you.

Do you have any helpful time or stress cutting stratergies you use?

Ooh! That's Pinterest...ing! ~ The Mummy edition

I'm a mummy and some days are a little hard

ok who am I kidding somedays I just want to run and hide

But its the most rewarding thing in the world

since having my babies I have always said being a mummy to these 2 precious little boys

Is what I was put on this earth for

yep even when I'm having a really bad day, once its over I know its all meant to be

So this week for Tina Gray {dot} Me

 

I thought I'd share some motherhood quotes from my

All Things Mummy

board

They are all of that and more, i want this in my lounge room

I love this every stretchie has a reason for being there

I'm proud of my "love lines"

something we should all remember as mummys

Alright hands up if youve done it ;)
I have well with a leaky nappy once nappy is changed that is

I find it so hard to let the mess go but this would be the perfect reminder

It was never going to be easy but if we remember these little things

we'll learn to cherish it and live in the momment alot more

What have you been pinning on Pinterest this week?

Feeling Like Tara Again

I've been a single mumma for almost 7 weeks now

and it's been hard

Some days are fabulous and others arent so great at all

Amongst the good days things seem like a right old mess

and just cant seem to be fixed right now and not from a lack of trying

I've made choices that aren't really the best for me but I'm working on it

but all of it is teaching me things about myself

my strengths and weakness's, how much I will tolerate & how much I need certain things

In saying that though I have had to occupy my mind with other things

because things aren't getting better in some aspects

I have thrown myself into finding me again

thrown myself into Blossoming into me

*image credit

As I've said in this post here I'm not exactly sure how to do that or what I'm looking for

but I guess you could say things are happening?

* I'm trying to look after myself & move some of this baby weight

Im not far off at all

I'm eating healthy and actually eating 3 times a day all healthy plus healthy snacks

drinking lots of water & working is helping too

I'm going to zumba classes once a week & I even brought a dance DVD 

* I'm planning for Christmas

it will just be me and the boys so Im going all out

and I am so so so excitied!

* I purchased the TAFE guide and have 2 courses that I am interested in

I just have to take that tentative step and apply

because could i really do it all?

Mother, be me, work, blog and study?

I guess theres only one way to find out right?

* I am starting to come back to being the mum I was

yes its true through all of this my mothering has slacked slightly

Dont get me wrong my boys are looked after they are fed, bathed & clothed

But the fun had gone

The outings the activites

Buts its all coming back.. slowly

The mother I want to be is starting to blossom again

* I am hoping to take my friend up on her offer for a little mini holiday

To where she is living now

I think it will be perfect for me and the boys

especially if its gorgeous weather

* Another big thought, that only happened today was a move interstate

Honestly I havn't really thought about it but I'm kinda thinking why not?

What's holding me here?

The boys are young enough to adapt

we would be walking into an already established circle of friends all who have kiddies!

The only thing is obviously its not a "on the whim" decison

There is so much to consider

But at least I can think about it right?

There is always room for possibility

* I'm trying to do things for me

I am in the process of making my room all about me

making it my safe place, my place to relax in

I am also saving up for a lavish hair cut and colour, I think I deserve it

I'm trying to re-ignite my passion for craft and its coming back a little bit

At one stage I was inspiring people that felt awesome

I want to get back to that

* I'm cooking more

the motivation for yummy meals every night is semi back

and Im loving the fact my freezer is full and finding new recipes

After reading this Post & Giveaway the other day from over at the gorgeous Naomis blog

 Seven Cherubs

I know I am on the right track

and that i really must get this book!

Looking at this list

I'm making positive steps

I still feel alone and scared of being alone 

but my future is looking brighter

Things aren't perfect right now and I knew they wouldn't be

But there is light at the end of the tunnel

and today... I have hope

What do you do to find you?

*edited for image credit forgot it again damn it lol

You Know You're a Mummy When #2

You know you're a mummy when...
You find kids toys in odd places.

Have you ever opened your kitchen draw to find this..

Or gone to answer the phone only to realise this phone actually dosent work?

Or perhaps you were in need of getting something out of the cupboard but had to move the parked car first

Or maybe there's a monster underneath your couch that collects kids things and hides them there?
I know I have one

Or even better you find a child where their toys should be?

You wouldnt find these things anywhere but in a home that has children it
and you cant help but giggle and take photo
They just never tell you your house would be literally be take over by these little people
But isn't it the best reminder that your house is filled with fun!

Have you found any toys or kids things in odd Places?

and
If you missed the 1st you know you're a mummy

you can read it here or maybe it should say smell it here?

no its probably a good thing you cant smell it ;)

Why I disappeared with no warning...

For those of you who may have noticed my absense

Never fear I am still here ;)

I have had a few issues going on that I have had to deal with and in all honesty my motivation for most things went out the window.

But now we are finding our groove again.

I wanted to blog a little about what has happened mainly to help me wrap my head around it a little more and open up the lines of communication for tips and advice.

The biggest reason as to why I havnt been around is because I have recently become a single mother.

My ex partner & I spilt after 8 years

Its been an up & down kind of 8 years but this time it all feels differnt.

I am truly fine about it all

Its been a long time coming and I think i'm handling it well

I have to really for the boys sake.

I think it helps that Mr S and I are getting along relatively well and keeping it amicable

which i am soooo grateful for!

So the past few weeks I have been trying to slip into the full time single mum of 2 role

which has been quite difficult but at the same time a breath of fresh air

But didn't leave much time as I worked out where to from here.

the answer was obviously Onwards and Upwards

I have a new found patience and my house is actually staying clean lol

Its given me the opportunity to get things done that i had been putting off as i try and keep myself busy

Im also trying new things

The boys and I are eating at the table more, Im decluttering like crazy!

and the biggest thing?

Im going back to work

Which now that I really dont have a choice, I'm excitied about.

Ive been cooking up huge meals and freezing them, budgeting more then ever and organising ahead as much as I can.

It is still very early days and Master J is taking it quite badly

which is my biggest priority at the momment

But I am feeling good and things are starting to fall back into place

Im looking forward to my new journey and even finding me, Tara again

I love being a mummy but somewhere along the way I got lost

its time to find me again

So i can shine and be he best mummy I could possibly be.

So consider me back... again!

You know you're a mummy when...

Your sense of smell becomes atuned to poop.

So your in a group of friends all mummas all with kids.

Your all out somewhere enjoying a hot choccie and a coffee

and the kids are all running, crawling & playing together

And then...

"Right! who's pooed?"

One mumma will always catch a whiff of a not so pleasent nappy

which then means the next 5 minutes are spent

chasing kids and checking bums until the culprit is found.

Im convinced kids have a 6th sense to the word "poo"

Even if they arent old enough to understand it or say it

As soon as they hear it wether they are walking or crawling they scatter.

Making our job even harder!

*image

And dont even get me started on the actual nappy change side of it

They seem to wiggle and squirm more when theres poo inside

So not only do you need 8 arms to juggle baby nappy wipes and clothes

you need to be a ninja to avoid a hand or foot ending up in the wee little surprise ;)

Once said culprit has a clean bum and mum has broken out in a sweat

Normal mothery conversationa and hot drink sipping commences and child running and screaming contintues

Until...

"Right! who's pooed?"

siiiigh here we go again ;)

Respect

When a baby is born there is always the talk of what the grandparents and significant members of the family will be called, by the child once old enough to talk.

In our family we have the normal nana and grandma, poppa and grandpa

There is 3 beautiful Auntys, 3 Uncles and lots of Cousins.

So they are norm right? Most families have those family members.

However we have alot of other family that are all very close to our boys.

Such as our aunts and uncles, our nanas and grandpas and our cousins.

We didnt really think too much about wether our boys needed to call them by anything other then their name or nickname.

For me it was a given that they would have the same respect for our extended family as they do for the rest of the family.

So our boys call our Auntys, Aunty too, they call my nana - nanny and so forth

When it comes to our cousins we just go with whatever comes out at the time

nicknames, full names whatever is said

But I think in the long run I would love for them to be called Aunty or Uncle ... too.

In my family its a sign of respect and authority.

My step 2nd cousins call me aunty thats how its been since they could talk

I love it, it makes me feel resepcted and very much part of their family.

I want the same for our cousins and extended family.

I want our boys to know they are important people in our lives and that we love, respect and hold them in high regard.

I think it also helps build a better relationship with other family members

It helps them to know they are surrounded by people they can trust and talk to if they need to.

Respect to older family members is huge to me so its a quality I feel my children need to have too

Its a stepping stone of life and in turn

will hopefully help teach respect for themselves and others

*image

Do you have family members or friends that your children call Aunty or Uncle etc?

How else do you help instill respect into your children?

Do you Love your life?

This question popped up at me the other day.
Do you love your life?

Simple answer NO I dont love parts of my life
More in depth answer?
Well here we go!

I cam across a status on one of my favourite FB pages
From someone who I admire, look up to and respect so very much.

Her status was simple.

"LOVE my life xxx"

How could she not love her life
After all she has been through she is finally living out her dream,
and doing a damn fine job at it too!
I could not be happier for her

But I envy her for my own selfish reasons
I want my dreams to come true too
I just have no idea where to start or even what they all are.

I read that status about 3 times
Each time feeling a pang of guilt
I dont love my life, well for the most part, and that straight out sucks.

I love being a mother more then anything
Some days are really hard others are just pure bliss but i know
I was put on this Earth to be a mother, to be a mother to these boys.
I love I am able to be a SAHMummy, that I even have this opportunity, twice even.
This is the part of my life I DO love.

There are many parts of my life that i wish could be better or differnt
Only i can change these I know that
but it dosent make it any easier trying to figure out how to change those things.

There is something missing.
I dont know what it is but I am on a mission to find out.

Before I had my babes I worked full time in one of the bigger supermarkets
I was heading towards a career with them
I decided that my babies would come next though.
A decsion I do NOT regret
It was absolutly the right one.

Before working I studied Community Services and Youth Work
Both I was good at nither of which interest me anymore.

I love to help people
I love to organise
I absolutly loved planning and decorating Master Js 3rd Birthday Party
and I have loved learning all these interesting things about his speech and behaviour.

There is defiantly a few things I could I do around the things I love
I just have so many dreams and desires
I just dont know where to start or what to do :|

I have never been the type of person where great things have fallen in my lap
I have always had to put blood sweat and tears into everything I have ever wanted
and thats ok by me
It gives me a sense of accomplishment
I can say I did it on my own.
This will be no differnt.
I hope this time though more opportunitys arise to make the decison a little easier
Only leaving me with the hard work required to succeed.

I know the universe will guide me in the direction I'm meant to be heading
I believe whole heartdly it will show me what I am supposed to do alongside being a mummy
We have already made one decsion regarding me returning to work
and I hope that in itself opens a few new doors.

In the mean time I will follow my one true love of mothering
Walk this path with passion and joy
Love the momment
For now I will love with my everything that part of my life

One day I will love my life completely not just part of it

One day I too will be living out my dreams.

One day I will have the life I dream of for my family